I’m an extrovert. I enjoy being around people. Because of that, I am a bit of a social butterfly. This doesn’t mean though, I cannot enjoy those moments of solitude. For me I need those moments just as much as I need those social moments.
Sometimes I need them most after I’ve been social for a while. This weekend I went princess fishing. Sunday on my way home I was glad to be in the car by myself. I was happy to come home to an empty house. After spending 3 days in constant company I need some me time. The silence of my home was just relaxing. I needed to decompress.
I can be alone and not lonely*. Despite being an extrovert I do not need constant company to be happy. This is a common misconception about extroverts, well this extrovert anyway. In fact I spend a lot of time alone and I don’t really mind. I have the ability to entertain myself. If I feel the need to visit or for company then I just call a friend and invite them somewhere. But I’m a single woman with a lot of married friends with lives of their own. This means there are plenty of times if I want to do something then I do it by myself.
If I want to go to a certain restaurant to eat I usually call a few friends to see if they’re available. Yet if they’re not then I’ll just go by myself. Not for take out, I go and sit and eat at the restaurant. I can read a book or play on my phone while I wait for my food. Or sometimes just think. But mostly I usually read. It doesn’t make me self-conscience or lonely. It’s dinner with the person who knows me best, me!
Driving on road trips by myself isn’t uncommon either. I have several friends that live 9 to 11 or so hours away. It’s a long drive but I enjoy it so much. Usually those long drives give me some perspectives on issues I’m struggling with. Sometimes I get clarity I didn’t realize I needed. I call this my conversations with God. 🙂 I usually feel lighter and happier when I get to my destination. However after that long in a car, with the excitement of getting to see my friends, I am unable to shut up or be still for a while once I get there.
So I do things alone. I don’t mind. I enjoy my own company.
I think enjoying your own company is important in finding your joy. If you don’t like to spend time with yourself then perhaps you need to figure out why. I believe if you cannot tolerate being by yourself then perhaps you don’t have inner peace. Inner peace is an essential part of happiness in my opinion. For me this is why I can be alone and yet not lonely.
Sometimes I not only enjoy solitude but need it. It helps center me. Usually when I am unhappy or struggling with finding my joy, it’s because I am not centered and not focusing on the good. Being centered helps me find joy in the small things. Things like enjoying solitude. 😉
Find your joy and laissez les bons temps rouler!
*The idea for this post came from a lovely piece on a blog I follow. You can find it here! Or go to: http://wanderwomanblog.com/2014/10/11/alone-vs-lonely/